¡Introducing Little Orphan Jennie!

Dear Dr. Bones,

Scabbin’ for ScroogeBank in the columns an’ e-columns of the Voice of Louisedayhicksville, a certain Party Neocomradess (fifth grade) J. C. Braceras, "lawyer and political commentator [1]", has arrived at her James Russell Lowell Moment™ (Pat. Pend.) [2]:

. . . last best hope . . . final chance to redeem . . . either validate or repudiate . . . It is about first principles. The lines have been drawn. Which side are you on?

The thing havin’ been thus attempted in prose, ¿how about we try rime?

Once to every nerd and wingnut Comes the moment to decide, In the clash of Doit and Shekel For the better payin’ side. Some great boon, the new Mass. Zion, Offers us a rival bid And that choice goes by forever, ¡Better grab it _pronto_, kid!

Not altogether happy. ¿Perhaps if we let the pet g@@gle chew on it a little, to break it in, like?

Una vez que todos los nerd y tuerca de mariposa / Llega el momento de decidir, / En el choque de Doit y Shekel / Por el lado del pagando mejor . Algunas gran bendición, la nueva Misa Sión, / Nos ofrece una oferta rival / Y que la elección va por siempre, ¡Es mejor cogerlo _pronto_, chico!

(( ¡Oh, well! ))

That will do for whight now. Please *do* make a memorandumb, though, sir, of Little Orphan Jennie. I mean to get back to her freeladyship soon and maybe scribble a little less merrily.

Happy days.
--JHM

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[1] The political commentary of the PNC-5 JCB neomechanism you may examine for yourself, sir.

In addition to this morning’s portentous singin’ with Lowell an’ Lucifer an’ all the _Herald_ angels, the freedame puts out a regular (?) vanity e-press product called "JENNIFER BRACERAS / Political and Cultural Commentary / by a Red Mom in the Bluest State.

Possibly, though that is not what the blog is called, but only the name of the blog, or maybe what the name is called -- also floatin’ around in the factional drool is plain (he jested) RedMom-BlueState.org (for of course it was not plain at all, but tutti-frutti to the max).

(( The _Alice_ guy could have lots of fun with little Miss Jennie makin’ haddocks’ eyes at her Uncle Scrooge, an’ at her Daddy Warbucks, _¡y naturalamnente a su Tio Ruperto!_.

"We report (what is out there), you deride (what you find)."

You really should come look at this little neocircus, Bones. The ScroogeBanksters (or equivalent at NewsCorp or the Warbucks Widget Trust) have stood Little Orphan Jennie to a really spiffy, pro website.

A respectable HTML-coat donkey like me would have to spend forty-five minutes with a cookbook to figure out just how they did the label of the appellation of the droolpan in Read, Blew an’ Colourblind. Firstlord Ebenezer was presumably just indulgin’ an idiot niece, but there are real commercial possibilities here: the Frogs, and we Paddies, and every other band of Lesser Breeds Without that waves a tricolor flag (of which there seem to be several hundred) ought to be wanting one too, after maybe a little nudgin’ from the Commercial Speech Division of ScroogeBank.

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Pardon my technicalities, sir. The affiliation of the PNC-5 JCB mechanism with the shyster community are of more interest to neocomradological science.

¡Not merely a shystatrix is her freeladyship, but a H*rv*rd one!

As a matter of fact, her freeladyship’s C. V. (as self-presented) is so similar to that of St. Elizabeth of Warrenbuffet -- up to a certain point -- that I find it difficult to avoid guessing that the liver of PNC-5 JCB may bubble with spite an’ envy whenever her freeladyship is forced to reflect how much farther than that point Her Beatitude has somehow managed to sneak. "Life is unfair," obviously. Were it not, of course their Jennie would be sittin’ pretty in the Fedguv Senate, and our Lizzie still taking parajournalistic whacks at the L. D. hicks. (At the Blue Blazers would be more likely, though, really, considering Her Beatitude’s Trotskyite attitudes..)

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[2] My own patent application will soon be pending. ¡Imagine getting a nickle for one’s ownself every time the sweet puppies of Endarkenment start barkin’ like they had just swallowed his freelordship of Kirkegaard!