"... energy, water, cheese, mineral resources ..."

Dear Dr. Bones,

Hannibal the Clown writes

"[F]uture conflicts will involve wars among nations and alliances of nations waged by powerful armed forces for regional power and influence; fights for energy, water, food, mineral resources and ... wealth"

One can guess why such views might be popular at the Officers Clubs of ChristoKorea, Dr. Bones, or better, why they *would* be popular, were the estimable CK’s in any position to pay for an establishment of the violence profession. [1]

Surveying Foxcuckooland as a whole, however, that vast mental wastecontinent that stretches from sea to whinin’ sea, and of which the tiny province (reservation, almost) of ChristoKorea is almost the least of backward corners, one must proclaim Hannibal badly out of step with the market he proposes to break into.

There is, to be sure, a war most of our holy-Homelandic™ wingnutettes and wingnuts would like to fight, but, alas!, it is much more like what Hannibal’s bureaucratic enemies at the U. S. Department of Aggression are accused of cravin’, "light forces designed to operate from fixed bases", that, an’ crappy Petræo-MacNamaran COIN an’ assorted other such wimperies, old and maybe sometimes new.

Were Hannibal the Clown to consult his proposed customers, those whom devotees of Mlle. de la Main Invisible have memorably declared "always right," he would be wastin’ his retirement time tryin’ to help them wage their War on Wetbacks (Pat. Pend.). Though not identical with what Neocomrade Dr. Gen. D. H. Petræus of Princeton and West Point has been up to lately somewhere out east of Suez, the contemplated WoW product will be far more like it that like the daydreams of Hannibal.

The biggest difference, as it seems to one who admittedly never soared higher in the firmament of Mars and Bellona than SP-5, is that mainstream kiddie selfservatives propose precisely to defend a fixed position, viz., to keep the Spaniard rabble from takin’ away the kiddies’ own already existin’ cheese, not to sally forth and snatch somebody else’s. Indeed, south of Lesser Texas, there is not much cheese worth grabbin’ that I know of.

Hannibal the Clown’s dreams of neoglory point rather towards some such nifty scheme as annexin’ the west shore of the Gulf of Petroleum so as to keep the shifty Natives from swipin’ any more of our fossil fuel. As far as I can tell, kiddie selfservatives are quite incapable of seein’ anythin’ wrong with the Hannabalic sort of niftiness, but still, not to object is far from being the same as a positive endorsement.

What would it profit a Party-an’-Ideology neocomradess, after all, to gain the whole neo-Levant but lose "her own country" in the course of doin’ it? [2]

Alas, poor clown! in all probability, his paths of neoglory lead but to ... to fadin’ ... away ...... like ......... Corncob Doug . . . .

And I wish you, sir,
Happy and healthy and affordable days.




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[1] Rumor has it that the CK’s are havin’ trouble just keepin’ America’s Moonpaper afloat. But Father Zeus knows best.


[2] Quid enim proderit homini, si lucretur mundum totum et detrimentum faciat animae suae? [Ev. Marc. VIII:36]