_Hinweise auf eine Pfefferspraysphilosophie_[0]

Dear Dr. Bones,

Non-violent protesters brutally pepper-sprayed at UC Davis Bob_Neer | Sat, Nov 19, 2011 9:33 PM EST Hat tip NYT, which reports calls for the resignation of the university’s chancellor (NB: Harvard President Drew Faust, who has Occupy protesters of her own). (( &c. &c. ))

You know... This goes back to, officers thinking that their so-called non-violent means of control (pepper spray, rubber bullets, etc) can be used with impunity since no one is (USUALLY) permanently hurt (of course, tell that poor girl at the Red Sox (?) rally that – oh wait, they can’t). Not only do we need to stand up for the 99% and all that that entails, but we need a SERIOUS discussion about security vs liberty and the brutality that is using these so-called less violent crowd control devices of theirs. Because if they keep sending people to the hospital in critical condition, they’re gonna get their toys taken away from them. lynne @ Sun 20 Nov 1:54 AM

As I started to say in the title, sir, _Notes towards a Philosophy of Pepper Spray_ (seven volumes, boxed, suitable for throwing) would go a long way towards putting some "intellectual foundations" [1] under the grand Occupy Televisionland entertainment of Fall 2011.

I could write three or four tomes myself, and if I did, I would certainly devote a chapter to the exact differences between (1a) Kampus Kops and (1b) the real McCoy. There would be a long historical excursus, naturally, on Century XIX in the coalfields of Appalachia and 1968 in the Y*rd of H*rv*rd, as well as 316 slightly less pertinent instances of secret-sector enforcements of Law and Order. [2]

Vaguely parallel to that idle and pedantic distinction would run another, between (2a) ("mere") YooTube clips and (2b) professional MacL@@han-Murdochware, the latter being characterized above all, as I analyze, by distinctly non-random production values. Especially by knowing more or less when to stop, as amateur iconodules never seem to: I betcha _In der Beschränkung zeigt sich erst der Meister_ was intended precisely to distinguish between the master *craftsman* and the still-wet-behind-the-awl journeyman or slapdash dilettante aristos.

As to the immediate occasion of the present pepperfoolery, suffice it to say that here we have Amateur Hour all ’round. Presumably most of the patients or victims shown may pass for "real students," though as we shall be not-writing a work of philosophy, that, too, will not be assumed uncritically. Of course I understand that the dignity of Philosophy must be preserved by excluding such sheer whight-winged nutbattism as supposing the whole _m’gillâ_ to have been concocted on the grounds of St. Elizabeth of Warrenbuffet’s in-stately home for campaign purposes, the orange gunk being furniture polish or the like. [3]

Happy days.
--JHM

___
[0]

Pfefferspray ist ein Reizstoff, der gegen Menschen und andere Säugetiere wirkt. Mit dem Begriff ist meist ein Reizstoffsprühgerät mitsamt dem enthaltenem Wirkstoff _Oleoresin Capsicum_ gemeint. Es wird in der Regel als Distanzwaffe verwendet. Insbesondere in den USA und Kanada dient es als Bärenabwehrmittel.

Hmmm. ¿How if our picturesque institutions were to sic she-bears [IV Lib. Reg. II:23ff.] instead of pseudocops on troublesome kiddies?

(( The pet g@@gle took a long time to find it, so let me put on record that it is _DAS Pfefferspray_, neuter gender. ))

=

[1] "Pardon my Drool." Or rather, more exactly, the drool of Her Beatitude, which it would be pleasant, though not probable, to think was swiped from the late Mr. Thòreau of Concord: "If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.

=

[2] Taxpayer-funded tertiary educationalism in CA should make for some especially jolly litigation. Those are not "real policemen" who appear in these video representations, but, oddly enough, they are public-sector hired hands nonetheless.

"¿Pseudomorphosis, anybody?"

=

[3] I hear you objecting already, Dr. Bones, that the Lizzieards would not advance, but probably rather retard, the Apotheosis of Her Beatitude by such a fakery. Whight you are, it seems to me, but I am not at all sure it seems that way to the Lizzieards themselves. Being Faculty Lounge Lizzieards mostly, or courtiers over to the Palace of Public Television, their perspective on political sociology and psychology can diverge widely from that of the earthbound.

As I said, though, you are quight whight to expect that at least 98.6% of Fratboy voters, actual or potential, will take one glance an’ side with the pseudocops. No, there I go again, that’s ’rong too: most likely very few Republicanines will ever see it.

That last, by the way, is a definite prediction about the future made by McChicken: should the Funders of Fratboy decide to make a big deal of it, then I shall thoroughly deserve to be gloated at. So make a memorandumb of it and we shall see.

Mention of the PPT allows me to extend the above parallelism a little, as follows

(1a) Kampus Kops (H*rv*rd) (2a) YooTube artists
(1b) municipal crimefighters (2b) NewsCorp
(1c) Kampus Kops (UC Davis) (2c) WGBH

Exactly what to call the third row I have yet to decide: ‘semireal’ is dubious ontologically, and furthermore sounds to my ear as if it has been imported from the Rovan Empire . I suppose most people would settle for ‘semipro[fessional]’, but there are so many philosophical problems about ‘professionalism’ even unprefixed that a whole eighth volume might become necessary. Take a look at the pigeonholes above and let me know how you would label them generically.

"Means well but needs work"

Dear Dr. Bones,

By MWBNW, I refer to the spoofery of ‘johnd’ over on Mont Bleu:

For What It’s Worth: The Occupy Movement mark-bail | Sat, Nov 12, 2011 10:32 AM EST (...) comparisons between the Occupy Movement and the Tea Party (...)

Building on the thread-starter... (...) In the interest of something like intellectual discipline, I wonder if Mark and Deborah would agree that Occupy Everything is at least inspired by, if not rooted in, the Arab Spring movement that began in December 2010 in Tunesia. I think we are seeing a world-wide recognition and push-back against the class warfare that moneyed interests have been fighting against the rest of us for decades. In my view, it began in the Middle East — a region, not coincidentally, where the role of US multi-national corporations is particularly unsavory. The dilemma of Arab Spring has always been that while America (and our public figures) must support the clear commitment to freedom and democracy that it embodies, its targets are oppressive governments and regimes that American government and private industry have kept in power for decades. In my view, this dilemma has now come home. Occupy Everything speaks to and for the 99%. Our government does not. (...) That dissonance is inconsistent with a free republic, and if our political system has any life left, we in the 99% will change that dissonance. somervilletom @ Sat 12 Nov 11:33 AM

Maybe the Arab Spring took its lead from the Tea Party. I know ideology will force many to dismiss this idea but it is possible. johnd @ Sat 12 Nov 10:49 PM

(A) Recognizing, that one has to start somewhere ... why, even Miss Even and Mr. Newton was merely fiddlin’ with an apple one day, when ¡lightning struck! ..., and

(B) Cognizant that anybooby with a natural flair for the Crimson Art would instantly snatch up "means well, but needs work" and take a run at the New Cerberus, that A-Spring Occupation Putty that bestrides the whole world like a miasma.

A "Murdochian miasma" one might say with sound intellectual foundation (sp?) in depth or at depth: if one digs down deep enough at any point on the Johndeweyplatz in the Taxarrears subdivision of Rio Limbaugh, one hits a TV cable. McBard was whight again: "One touch of MacL@@han" makes lots an' lots of antecedently unrelated-lookin’ volks "kin." Or look like kin, anyway. or like people with kin in the game.

No. The puzzle (I presume) for Social Scientism is not that a passionate urge to see oneself performing on The T@@B exists in the first place, that, I take it, is sufficiently accounted for by the _peccatum originale_ hypothesis of Dr. Gloomygus of Hippo University in Neotunisia. The great problem is rather that the level of this selfnarcissism should fluctuate so wildly. For years an’ years, ever since the Silent Majoruty finally shut up, the tubewaves were abandoned to the (almost) exclusive discretion of Neocomrade Dr. R. H. Limbaugh "highly trained broadcast specialists." Whereas lately we have had "Open Line Fryday" (twenty-four)-seven. Not much steak, mayble, but lots and lots of sizzle.

¿What hath Fox wrought? And furthermore, an' *especially*, ¿How did Fox wreak it?

These, in this keyboard's view, are the Great Mysteries of Life just at present

Comrade Poster hypothesises that those who harp on the A-String have taken their music lessons from the Tee Putty. Literally that seems to me out of the question, the mental universe of Seemighties and Muzzies having long been consciously and deliberately hostile to all influences perceived by them as emanating from the Whight Civilisation of the Western Race, also known as "Wunnerful US." The late Prof. Hourani, for example, wrote a big book called _Arabic Thought in the Liberal Age 1789-1939_ . His title suggests that that all hope for successful contamination/enrichment of the Natives had been abandoned as long ago as Anno Religionismi 1358-1939-5699. That date, though itself flagrantly Eurocentric, nevertheless does sound about whight, though naturally one could argue that there was much less hope earlier than one particular author makes out, or that miracles remained possible much nearer our own times, even if they have not actually happened.

To travel as a fellow with Comrade Poster would require one to think *really* dimly of the Arab/Seemighty Mind. Unless oneself a complete wad, who could seriously think the Tee Putty tripe an' baloney better worth borrowing than the French Revolution (which is pretty much what Hourani understands by the Hell word)? The proposal is about as plausible as it would be to regard Colonel al-Násir as the proximate cause of Students for a Democratic Socient, and thus ideological grandfather to that Hate-’68 Movement fated in due course to star I. X. Kristol an' N. X. Podhòretz. One can say that the thing is chronologically possible, but, that said, ¿what?

However I can be more cheerful about Comrade Poster if we give up the strict _literaliter_, picturing vast hordes of Natives avidly following NewsCorp in quest of pointers on the technique of soggin’ in the street. Looking at the correlation of farces more figuratively, or perhaps simply from a greater distance that allows a wider perspective, I believe his conjecture collapses into my own. It seems intelligible enough, that is, to say "Murdoch dunnit" as shorthand for "None of this would have been happening--no Zucchini People, no A-Springers, no Tee Putty--had Television never been."

It is close to tautology, maybe too close for comfort, to announce that there is a sort of family resemblance among all MacL@@hanoid techniques of agitation and propaganda. It is also distressingly like unto the Gigaguru's own pet drool about mediums replacing messages.

At this point, I worry a little about possibly falling into Comrade Poster's sandtrap, the one labelled "ideology will force many to dismiss this idea." [1] It is extremely repugnant to me that everything Vox Pop. or the AstroTurf™baggers do on, by and for TV looks a lot like everything else done on, by and for TV, but of course it might be so no matter how much it displeases.

Happy days.
--JHM


___
[1] As Heraclitus says, one can never fall twice into the same sandtrap.

I must admit that I am sneaking in a second santrap here. Citizen Poster, who is not really a comrade, I fear, was just pointin' out that most mainstream Blue Blazers think highly of the A-rab Spring; of the T-putty Sog, not so much.

That implicit analysis is true enough to be getting on with, but when Poster himself gets on with it to Blazerdom rejectin' "Maybe the Arab Spring took its lead from the Tea Party" on that account, I believe he is engaged in defensive flimflam designed to distract attention from the fact that there is really nothin' much to be said for his parallelism beyond the bare chronological possibility of it, as noted above. Or, if perchance there is more, he does not mention it. And I, at any rate, cannot guess it unassisted.

I could, to be sure, dig a sort of counter-sandtrap and claim that the citizen talks this way mostly because it pleases him to suppose that all good things are--MUST be--consequences of the AEIdeology in theory, of the Party of Big Management in practice.

In fact, it is not easy to think of any sort or condition of Lesser Breeds Without who attentively mark what America's Otherparty does, or what Heritagitarians an' Catoholics an' Hoovervillains of Palo Alto (&c. &c.) preach that the Otherparty should do, and then attempt emulation at home. Leave out the Torycomrades on Airstrip One an' their counterparts in former Brit colonies of the whight-wing Anglophoney type, and you will find, I think, hardy anybooby at all. There is lots of flat-out reaction in the world, and lots of ‘neoliberalism’ as well, but very little of it has been exported from G*d’s Country.

Otherpartisans are vaguely aware of this themselves, or act as if they were. It might be worth some credentialled social scientizer’s time and trouble to try to establish quantitatively whether Party neocomrades more frequently (A) bark that they could not care less what foreigners think, or (B) fatuously flatter themselves, along the present lines, that everybody overseas is lookin' ever towards the Party of Grant & Hoover.

My guess is that contempt is much more common than the softer sentimentality, for it is hard to get away from "¡No More Mr. Nice Guy!" amongst the neocomrades. Still, a guess is only a guess, and a generalization may be idiotic. It would be nice to really KNOW.

Meanwhile, one can be quite certain that Citizen Poster himself is no run-of-the-mill Republicanine. Were he that, he would simply never have heard of the Great Blue Hill, let alone be diggin' his little sandtraps on the slopes.

I clave, thou clavest, she . . .

Dear Dr. Bones,

¡No craven is Klaving! It claves, ever steadfast, to . . . .

Well, there is a puzzle for the student of Neocomradology: ¿To what, exactly, does our _señorito du jour_ clave?

It assures us itself -- as a bottomline, no less -- that Klavingesque ‘values’ are more important than other volks’ ‘necks’. [0]

Such assurance is needless in the particular cases of the Muses and thee and me, naturally. We had the number of Master Narcissus Dexter well before there were any sellphones to put it into: "Narky loves Narky; that is, I am I." [1] So did Mrs. Trollope in the 1830’s, to whom, as you know, I prefer to appeal to when out to address specifically Yank self-infatuation.

Now whenever a whight-wing nutbat starts goin’ on ’bout ‘values’, the first thing to do, obviously, is re-read the fine print on Terms & Conditions, verifying carefully wherein this week’s standards an’ neocriteria differ from last week’s, whether she (the nutbat) has put her weasels to work on the wordin’, tryin’ to get that five bucks a month for the ScroogeBank suckercard by crook, Capt. Hook havin’ failed his employin’ Corporation deplorably.

By my lights, the best approach to "Klaving v. Cain" is whight up the middle through the lobby of ScroogeBank. I mean, ¿What do the TopPercenters who actually matter, fundin’wise, expect from their small people, from a Don Andresito Claving Patxama? ¿from a Mr. Nine Guy? ‘Values’ is indeed the pertinent word.

Uncle Ebenezer has long since disinherited me an’ changed the locks on the vault, of course, but I believe I had enough experience of his firstlordship before we quarreled to reconstruct how the Class of neogeezers think. It seems to be quite impossible that Uncle Ebb takes Mr. Nine Guy the least bit seriously, neither expectin’ nor desirin’ that Don Ermanigildo de’ Neri should become the POTUS of us all. The merest side-show is Mr. Nine Guy, a sort of Harold Stassen writ large an’ bold an’ colorblind-letter. Uncle Ebb is gung-ho for ‘Mittens’ Romney, of course. Everybooby knows that, posibly includin’ even Don Andresito. [2]

What I am undecided about is whether Uncle Ebb--an’ Daddy Warbucks _y Tio Ruperto_ an’ the whole Unionthugbasher League Club --are responsible for givin’ us Mr. Nine Guy, whether his godfathership be a deliberate ploy by the G.O.P. Geniuses® on the _panem et circenses_ paradigm, or no more than a funny thing that happened on Mittens’ March to the Forum .

(( DIGRESSION _ad homunculum. Though clearly "small people," Don Andresito is not utterly negligible. It barked somethin’ ’bout "allowing your opponents to hold you to their absurd re-creation of your standards," a thing which does indeed happen to whight-wing nutbats with some frequency. However it fails to point out that religionism is usually involved on such cases, with Lieberals an’ Demoncrats presuming to tell the kiddiecons, or even the freelordly Conners of Kiddies, what ‘true’ Christojudæanity would entail, usually Uncle Ebb givin’ all his R.O.I. to the Bad Poor an’ goin’ off to missionize at the cow-crazed Hindoo &c. &c -- pluperfect tripe and pepperoni..

(( True, in many specifically Christian models, the former-Christojudæan product line really did include that fun exuberance _credo quia absurdum_. That, however, was long ago. And in another country. And ¡fancy keeping a straight face while calling upon the neokiddies, or upon anybooby at all, to live down to Tertullianus of Carthage! ))

Happy days.
--JHM

___
[0] Yes, of course I agree that those shudder-quotes LOOK silly. Looks, however, are not everything.

Reflect, sir, and I believe you must agree that the Neck of Arminius is quite as figurative an’ neorhetorical in the path of Party & AEIdeology, as are the señoritoly Values.

===

[1] As you see, the Big Nine figured out _el clavanismo_ several centuries ago and reported Their preliminary research respults to Dr. Shakespeare.

BTW, ¿have Ms. Clio and the Sisters thought of suing a certain Person of Pizza for infringement of copywhight or trademark or patent or whatever? And then there is the _Bahá’iyya_ . . . .

===

[2] I picture Don Andresito, in that garret that appertains to it _quâ_ ‘conservative’ ‘intellectual’, pacin’ back an’ forth with gritted teeth, resolvin’ every second even more resolutely that its own Values must not be influenced in the slightest by the practical politics of its paymasters’ Party. This performance, though, will be much more worth attending to once Mittens is in like Flynn .

The Kentucky Woolite® Code

Dear Dr. Bones,

A Sheep in Sheep’s Clothing williamstowndem | Sun, Nov 6, 2011 6:07 PM EST By Lee Harrison, Chairman, Berkshire Brigades Still hiding behind a barn jacket and a big smile, Senator Scott Brown is hoping.... (...)

"Is that code?" as Geoff Peterson would say. First Responders….Transit modernization…Public Schools…College Modernization…educator… Or, to put it more simply – unless you are a public union worker or on the state bid list and paying Pacheco wages – No Soup for You. Preserve the jobs of people who haven’t missed a paycheck. porcupine @ Sun 6 Nov 7:32 PM

Of course it is code. ¿What else could it be?

The Demoncrat scribbler labels Senator Fratboy "a sheep," adding some irrelevant sartorial details. Then he complains, at length, that this very same frathouse animal always acts like a wolf. once Party Neocomrade A. M. McConnell has reminded it what species it belongs to. [1]

In the same code, which is no longer much of a secret, one writes "a porcupine" to convey (approximately) "a steady and temperate well-wisher of her holy Homeland™’s good."

Happy days.
--JHM

[1] Even Fratboy can be made a serious topic, if one perseveres a little. Or wanders off topic just a couple of hare’s breaths to rail against the Funders of Fratboy LLC.

Far more ‘revealing’ though (his own word) would be a thorough account of E-comrade ‘williamstowndem’, concerning whom all sorts of interesting questions arise, beginning with "¿Can he *really* believe that A. M. McConnell must hold, literally or figuratively, the paw of S. Ph. Brown every single time the latter casts a vote?

Now, Republicanines are no doubt a little short on bestembrightness. And of course only their third-raters an’ below go into politics, instead of off to the H*rv*rd Victory School, an’ then, by G*lly, it’s _¡Morgen die ganze Welt!_ time at the M. B. A. Corral! (Especially the offshore _Welt_, but I perceive that I digress...)

Anyway, ¿Might not his firstlordship the Majority Leader say to Fratboy, "Look here, Sonny: you always bark ‘¡NO!’ unless I or the Freiherr Untersturmleiter von Kantor specifically tell you different."? [*]

For a genuine political party, that plan ought to reduce conference inefficiency by about half, it being ordinarily a toss-up whether ¡Yay! or Neigh signifies support for reaction. Given the peculiarities of America’s Otherparty, however, an’ especially the Party neocomrades’ position vis-à-vis The Régime just at present, the time and energy saved ought to be more like ninety-five (95) percent (%).

It would certainly have avoided all fuss an’ bother in this case.

---

[*] It would be a shame to darken a Monday morning on the exalted slopes of the Great Blue Hill with any seriousness not thoroughly fake, but when it gets to be the middle of week, the Blazers might worry a little about who tells A. M. McConnell what to tell S. Ph. Brown. And through what channels, exactly.

I notice that ‘Williamstowndem’ seems to think the Spirit of Kentucky has something to do with it: "Scott Brown’s votes surely played well among his Kentucky mentors..." and --¿ain’t we got fun?-- that the Spirit of KY has it in for our own dear MA, "it was a direct attack on hard-pressed middle-class Massachusetts families." Sort of like Juno and Neptune and Carthage and a’ that, ¿doncha know?

Makes me wish I was easy-pressed and rolling in the blue grass with Secretariat and Dr. Johnson [1764, Ætat. 55], it does!

Odd, if not Old

Dear Dr. Bones,

Here’s a pretty penny for you, Old Guy:

What is “Old Boston”? Am I It? – Tom Conroy Has Valid Ammo Against Lizzie Warren – Mike Flaherty Going Back to Council? – New Bridge Means Faster Deliveries to Casino Customers eb3-fka-ernie-boch-iii | Fri, Nov 4, 2011 12:30 PM EST (...) Hey, anyone see the new draw bridge they’re building to replace the broken down one in East Boston near Suffolk Downs? It goes right to Chelsea. Once the casino is built the the Spanish and Asian hookers along with the drugs will arrive in 30 minutes or less. Guaranteed. Another great example of government and business working hand in hand. (...)

¡Well, well! Almost fifty years in exile from Chicagoland, and yet I would never have guessed that Chelsea is visible from the Palace of Public Television atop the Great Blue Hill.[*]

Be that as it ain’t, not too far away looms this , which must be just about the last word in Neoboston.. As soon as they have completed that "elevated plaza deck above Wonderland MBTA Station, " I promise to hobble up to it and wave at E-comrade Ernie.

Happy days.
--JHM

___
[*] Passing quickly over "A pity that Chelsea should be visible from *anywhere*," let me say that what we have here sounds a bit like the old chestnut about Governess Paling lookin’ forth over Siberia from Wasilla Felix. Given the general level of self-humour that obtains in Blue Blazerdom, however, . . . .

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, ’tis a pleasure to have someplace to go for a second opinion (after Dr. Carr’s of the _Herald_ of Louisedayhicksville, that is, naturally) on how the OTHER ninety-nine percent live. Accordingly, I cross my fnigers and hoep nobody drops a dime to the Thought Police about that distinctly Howie-oid exuberance--¡tusk, tusk!--concerning "Spanish and Asian hookers [and] drugs."

(( ¿Does one need a special license to do stuff like that on the well-gated communitarian slopes of the G. B. H.? If so, _¿Donde se puede solicitar un permiso?_ ))

"[not] nearly as plasticized in person"

Dear Dr. Bones,

The Brat Pack [1] are gonna be needin’ whole oceans of soothin’ drool like this before they finally swallow our old pal ‘Mittens’ [2], so please be sure to award _M. le baron de Goldman_ lots and lots of bonus points for makin’ such an early start.

His freelordship will be happy to have a cushion, I suspect, because if he keeps on as he has commenced, there will be many, many point subtractions on account of the freelordly agitprop technique.

His freelordship makes one interesting mistake on Day One and makes it very distinctly. I believe we should make a memorandumb of his freelordship’s second paragraph:

First, Romney didn’t look nearly as plasticized in person as in the TV debates. In front of a sympathetic crowd, and without notes, he sounded a lot more genuine, enthusiastic, and Reaganesque than the carefully-coiffed figure we hear on the tube.

The trouble with that, of course, is that kiddiecons are never under any circumstances gonnabe persuaded that the MacL@@han Tube does not afford them a direct personal knowledge of the figures performin’ on it for their viewin’ pleasure. His freelordship could bark on forever about how much they’d all like Mittens if they "could just really meet him," say, in a brothel or a shoppin’ mall or at a banquet for the Chambermaids of Commerce or wherever -- an’ achieve absolutely nothin’. Wally Wombschool an’ Cindy from Wasilla are unshakeably certain that Tube-based acquaintance is ¡at least! as good as the so-called "real thing." [0]

Were it in fact the case that Master Wally an’ Mizz Cindy would have to get close enough to Freelord Romneycare to shake a tentacle in order to think well of his plasticine [3] freelordship, poor Mittens would be doomed electorally. Since his freelordship is now certain to be the 2012 POTUSsal nominee of America’s Otherparty, it follows _per contra_ that Tube-basin’ can produce entirely satisfactory results when competently performed.

However, direct verbal assurances to that effect being no part of competent performance, I hereby subtract seven (7.0) points from Freelord Goldman’s score.

Let me know how *you* rate this latest ripe fruit of the Pajamatarian Mind.

Happy days (through affordable glovecare)
--JHM


___
[1] I speak loosely. The gutvolks who really NEED Mittophile drool are, plainly, the hired-hand specialists in Brat Pack Management, not that obscure, palpitatin’ wad of pajamaclad kiddie selfservatives who constitute the rank-an’-file Base an’ Vile.

At the top of the Party iceberg, jowls resplendent in the light an’ toes well up out of the chilly brine, perch their Serene Firstlordships, the Hirers of Hands, in whose interest all things (properly) Republicanine come to pass.

==

[2] http://j.mp/tiigtk

==

[3] There is rather a fun funny lurkin’ in ‘plastic’ for the "Classic Studies" subclass of wombscholar, like that good-natured dingalingess who rang up Dr. Limbaugh on Monday. There cannot, however, be very many of her out there.

==

[0] Not really pertinent here, yet never-too-often-repeated-given-half-an-excuse, are the sage observations of Karl, Firstlord Rove in the peerage of Foxcuckooland, concernin’ the former "real world":

"That is not the way the world really works anymore. WE are an Empire now , and when WE act, WE create OUR OWN reality. And while you’re studying that reality -- judiciously, as you will -- WE will act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that’s how things will sort out. WE are history’s actors . . . and you, all of you, will be left to just study what WE do.’’ (&c.) "

(( Actually, it may even be kinda pertinent, as follows: his firstlordship did not explain to Comrade Suskind exactly HOW a whole Rovan Empire can be built in a day. I have always taken for granted that the MacL@@han Tube must play an enormous rôle. Today, 11/03/2011 04:01AM, I notice that I have been taking this for grant and ask Dr. Bones to prepare a memorandumb of the fact.

(( ¡Be caveated, O Bones! that you will soon, in all probability, be called upon to study a neoreality labelled somethin’ like Up from Plastic: Meet the New Real Romney! . ))





.

Return to Sender

Dear Dr. Bones,

This

Five possible demands for the Occupy movement Bob_Neer | Tue, Nov 1, 2011 12:29 PM EST MarketWatch columnist David Weidner offered five possible demands for the Occupy movement today that merit some consideration. (...)

is no bees’ wax of yours or mine, really, but still . . . !

If *I* was an infantile Leftist [1] -- or, even more so, a supercultivated Blue Blazer too sensible ever to camp out in the foggy, foggy dew _in propriâ personâ_--I would recommend returning this horse to sender unopened.

Maybe that would mean missing an opportunity, but the odds are _primâ facie_ against it, considering that Pegasus Five here came festooned with an introductory write-up that mentions "gobbledygook about income inequality." And "handouts." And is bottom-lined with "[L]et’s face it: [w]hen it comes to real solutions, this group isn’t even at the starting line."

Switchin’ sides, let me very briefly personate Neocomrade Ulysses (as I tentatively reconstruct him): "Ideally, O King Agamurdoch an’ all ye well-greaved Republicanines, the brat pack will actually fall for it and start clamoring for one of the above. And then we have ’em where we want ’em, because all five points are all quite impossible politically, an’ to clamor for the impossible makes the clamorer look childish an’ Yootopian, not to mention most exceedin’ly nineteen-sixties. Especially when you sic a competent advertisin’ agency on ’em."

"There can be no harm in tryin’ my plan on, O neocomrades, for we will be way ahead, should they actually bite.

"Probably, however, they will not. In that case, the Daughters of Virtue & Sons of Wisdom (LLC) are no worse off, we will simply have to wait for colder weather to set in at Zucchini Plaza, an’ boredom out in Televisionland, in the meantime repeatin’ as often as the traffic will bear that "This group isn’t even at the starting line."

"That mantra is bound to take effect eventually. [2]"

Happy days.
--Cassandra



___
[1] One of that mob which the Odysseus of The Wall Street Jingo calls "hardcore kids" (in yet another suspicious-makin’ phrase).

=

[2] "‘Eventually’ may be hastened a little by judiciously hintin’ from time to time that we, the DV&SW (LLC), have heard what the brats are goin’ on about an’ are workin’ 24/7 behind closed doors on a well-past-the-startin’-line proposal to do somethin’ SERIOUS about all that "income inequality" jazz.

"Of course we aren’t and we shouldn’t be, but there is no need to be strictly honest with hardcore troublemakers. Especially when they started it."

***

Thus Ulysses, neocomrade of many wiles.

The student will notice that to publish this scheme (worded Ulysses’ way rather than mine, naturally) is already to begin to implement it.

Myself, I would have stuck in just a pinch more _suggestio falsi_ about the TopPercenters repentin’ an’ amendin’ _suâ sponte_ now that they are aware that there exists a certain perception problem out in the boondocks. That baloney could be pushed so far one falls off the far side of the horse after the manner of Richard XXXVII Nixon’s "secret plan" for peace in Indochina, but the good volks at the _Jingo_ have been marketin’ sizzle at the expense of steak for a long, long time. They certainlÿ ought to be able to avoid gross blunders.

The effect to be achieved is pretty commonplace, really, amounting to lots of preliminary ticker tape and media time for, say, " the blue-ribbon buy-partisan Ailes-Samuelson panel on ‘The Causes and Cure of Economic Inequality in America’ " followed by . . .

... (crickets) . . . .